Sunday, November 30, 2008

Hoping for a new beginning...

I got a new job @ Shadyside Hospital a few wks ago as a telephone operator. I like it SO MUCH better that the old job! ;) Every job has its drama & rough points, but for the most part taking this job was for the better. I took my pre-admissions exam last saturday to get into nursing school. Let's hope I get in. *crosses fingers*

The love life is a whole different story. It's been going pretty downhill for quite a few months now, I've just chose to ignore it. I've hit the end. I can't handle it anymore. There are days I wanna avoid him completely & say go the f*** away, & other days I sorta miss how it used to be. It was nice in the beginning. Cards, flowers, & just being so interested in how my day went. Now; it's like 'eh, w/e'. He'll listen, but there's next to no interest. :-\ There are several options that have arose to start a new beginning & be happy again. I just don't really know how to do it. I love this one, I really do. I just can't stand how he lives his life & doesn't care or have any intentions of changing how he does things. (Or should I say, things he doesn't do?) Job-wise I'm content, friends & family-wise I'm wonderful--I miss them all!; but love-wise I just don't seem happy anymore. There just seems to be no future there anymore. All I see is living next to a junk yard--which I don't want! I think it's about time for an upgrade in my life. Time for something/someone who isn't always gonna have me so worried about what's coming next. I'd rather just be wondering instead of worrying. O:-)

1 comment:

Carla said...

We already talked about this, but you definitely deserve better. I know you love him, and I'm sure he loves you too. He just needs to assure you (and prove) the future will be fine. And if he doesn't do that, then out the door! Don't give up just yet, but make sure you set a deadline so you don't let it drag on too long. You know where to find me if you need me. I'm just a secret passageway away! <3